7 Years a Blessing: Ma

I've been putting off writing this post for at over a week. I didn't quite know what to say. I still don't. This will be a little long. It won't be formal, so I'll just share my heart and some of our story...



The Early Years

My Ma passed on Oct 26th this year. She had been in and out of the hospital for a very long time because of heart problems and other illnesses. She'd go in and would get out within a few days. The last time she went in was supposed to be no different. I was at work and the day was going smoothly. I hadn't checked my phone, but when I did I saw that my sister Taylor had called me several times. I figured she just wanted to chat, because it wasn't like I could go see her...she had just moved to South Carolina. My boyfriend had called me a couple of times too, which was unusual. He enjoys his time away from me because I ramble on and on and on about everything lol. Well, I heard the news and tried to keep my composure at work...didn't last long and I broke down. I really appreciate my coworkers because they came to my side and didn't leave until I left. My mom had went into the hospital less than a week prior to. We were supposed to take the kids to visit and I was going to cook her a big Sunday dinner. She was always cooking for someone even when she could hardly breathe and stand over the stove. I planned on making asparagus. I could never cook mine like hers. It would always be tough, lol. Also on the menu was fried chicken, mashed potatoes, biscuits a some kind of dessert. I miss her. It was almost like reflex to text or call her everyday. Even now, I'd have to catch myself when I want to call her. Ok...so on to the meaning behind this post's title...

I met my Ma in 2008. My brothers Rob, Taylor and I were adopted when I was about 4 and we were moved to Benton Harbor, MI. Our middle and last names were changed from Hopkins to Rivers. Our adopted mom died of breast cancer when I was 8, so we ended up being raised in a single father home along with a little sister and older brother. I'd say that life was good growing up. We never went without what we needed. We were VERY sheltered. I mean we'd have to ride our bikes in an endless circle in the driveway, lol. OMG, ya'll we hated it! At one point we could go from the street corner to the end of our gate post (mind you, we were 4 houses from the corner). It wasn't until I turned 17 that I could stay home by myself. Anyhoo, I won't ramble about my childhood. I'll try to keep this about my Ma. We were told that she didn't want us, but were we never given a reason why. My dad has a portfolio and in 2006 he showed it to us for the first time. That's only because he caught wind of my brothers trying to find our biological family. I was hurt inside about being given up but my pride reached the surface and I just didn't care. I figured to heck with them all. One random day God got a hold of me and told me that enough was enough.


Braylin's 1st Christmas

The Reunion

I was sitting on my couch in my apt. in Ypsilanti watching Harry Potter (one of my FAVES by the way) when God told me to look for her. I didn't ask questions and my emotions didn't have time to catch up to my hands. I grabbed my phone and got on Facebook. I figured that since everyone and their granny was FB maybe she would be too. There she was at the top of the list! I didn't know what she looked like, but the woman in the pic looked like me, just darker. Ya'll I started adding EVERYONE on her friend's list lol. I got freaked out because I saw so many girls names Jasmine Hopkins. I put up a status saying, "I think I found my mom". My aunt Sue responded, "I think you did too". I got so overwhelmed and started to cry. I messaged her all night. She waited til the next day to tell my Ma because she had just gotten out of the hospital after having complications with a heart surgery and they didn't want her to have a heart attack lol. 

I was at work when she called me. I told myself not to show emotions, but not to be hard. She cried on the phone, and secretly I wanted to jump through the phone and hug her. She said that there were so many Jasmine's listed because they had looked for us endlessly on every social media outlet that was available. She just didn't know that our names were changed. They planned a HUGE family reunion for us. She told me her story which was the opposite of what we were told. We loved on each other and talked and talked. It has been bliss (not perfection), but bliss ever since. She was a jeans and t-shirt kinda gal and her favorite kind of color was blue. I always wondered where some of my tom-boy ways came from. My Ma was my best friend. God was saving her for us. He knew ahead of time that her heart was what would take her but he gave us just about 7 years and it's like we never parted. He blessed her with 7 children and 7 grandchildren. She was able to watch her grandbabies grow. She wouldn't let them call her granny or grandma cause she said it made her sound old, lol. They call her G-G. I'm a Christian, so I understand death. I know that we will return from whence we came. Death is inevitable, but that doesn't make it easy. I'm so grateful. I love my family. We aren't all super close, but they took us in like we never left.


It hasn't gotten easier. My kids will ask to go to her house, and I'd have to fight back tears or duck off to the bathroom. Her favorite song was Tasha Cobbs' "For Your Glory". She'd sit in her spot at the dining table and sing it while looking at the window. The tears may never stop, but I'm satisfied with knowing that she is in good hands.

3 comments

  1. You have a beautiful story. I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom in December 2010. Some days are better than others but fond memories are what keep me going. I pray that you find comfort and peace during this time. <3

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    1. Thank you so much Yvette. I'm sorry for your loss as well. '10 wasn't long ago at all. I lost my adopted mom in '94 and I still have a hard time with that. God's covering will definitely help us. At times I just want to break down. I really appreciate your prayers <3

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